A Conscious Choice

Two years ago

Yesterday, I celebrated an anniversary. I noticed the day approaching in my diary and only realised on the day that I had actually made it. Two years. Facebook kindly sent me the photo of the last night I got drunk with two of my friends. We were all smiles. That was Saturday 23 May, 2015. At the time, I didn’t know it was going to be my last drink, but in so many ways, I am very glad it was.

I did some voluntary work with a counsellor as part of my Diploma in Counselling. I arrived one Monday, still hung-over, tired and a bit morose after losing my house keys, car keys and quite inelegantly vomiting in a car park of a local pub.

She suggested a 30 day detox, which I figured should be easy enough. She also suggested I write about it, which I did. I published a series of blogs on to her website under the pseudonym Roxi, I think I thought that it was best to protect my identity at this time, plus I was ashamed at my middle aged teenage binge drinking behaviour.

I wrote quite a bit during this process and it was helpful for me to get the story out. Like a purge, a word vomit and a way to keep me distracted. In the beginning, I stayed in a lot, I knocked back every social occasion I could, I meditated, I watched TV, I read, I ran like a demented woman and I drank a shed load of tea.

Georgia, my counsellor, went on to start an inspired collaboration called The Addictive World. Together with Kym Haynes a wonderful kinesiologist, they set up groups, started educating the people in these groups on ways to better cope with stress, spoke to council and community groups and have now taken this program around the country. I watch them in awe, two women tackling big issues including many varieties of addiction, domestic violence, PTSD, anxiety and general stress. They are starting to slowly and gently lead so many individuals and families into recovery. You can find out more about the incredible things they are up to at http://theaddictiveworld.com.au/ or find their facebook page at iRecoverMe https://www.facebook.com/theaddictiveworld.au/.

Here’s some of my blogs which I wrote when I was going through the 9 Conscious Choices and attending group, which was pretty daunting, scary, lonely and hard sometimes. My heart and soul have been opened by this group in such amazing ways. As well as the tears, we shared many laughs.

If you know or live with someone experiencing the cycle of addiction, it is impossible not to get pulled in to the drama. It is a hard place to find peace.  I know what it is like to live there and I’m a pretty good listener if you ever want to talk about it. I hope the blogs or addiction website are helpful to you or someone you know living with addiction.